- Happiness is a butterfly, which when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you….author unknown circa 1848
When I was very young, possibly 12 or 13 years old, I found this quote on a laminated card, that I could carry in my wallet, at Waldenbooks in the mall. I purchased and carried this reminder with me well into my 20’s as a reminder to let happiness land where it may. I am 51 years old now and believe this simple quote still upholds so much truth. In the past four decades, I have learned that happiness is the surrender vs. the control. It is the state of being vs. doing. It is within us, always waiting to find it’s way into our heart through accepting life in all of it’s pleasure and pain; the sweet disquieting acquiescence.
Happiness is both subjective and objective, immeasurable and measurable, which is why I believe the key to happiness starts with clearly defining what happiness means for YOU.
So, what does happiness mean for you? Without a clear definition, how will you know if you’re happy? Our minds love to make decisions and feel good about what we have decided. This is how we accomplish goals, through decision. If we haven’t decided how to be happy, it could make it harder to obtain, therefore ask yourself. What is happiness? What is my version of happiness? What makes my soul sing? What makes me feel as though I am experiencing an overall sense of well-being and contentment? What if you have more days filled with that sense than less days and you haven’t realized it? What if happiness is really a sense of well-being and contentment rather than what we expect it to be? Do we expect happiness to be a high – a moment that is filled with feelings of overwhelming happiness and excitement and if so, is that a reasonable expectation?
In closing, take a pen to paper and fill in the blank. Keep the paper close to you – in your wallet or in your phone. Remember this concept serves as a belief system, one that can allow for alignment and adjustment as needed, in order to help reach your goal….through decision.
Lisa Parani 